The Inside Secret to a Happy Married Life

If you want to know the secret to a happy married life, you should know that for each couple it’s different.  They might have had one thing that helped them to be happier than anything else, but there are many things that should be done to ensure that both you and your spouse are happy for life. Keep in mind that you will disagree on some things.  You will sometimes argue and it might get ugly.  Sometimes there will be hurt feelings and you might not always be in love with your spouse as he is with you or vice versa.  This is all normal – it’s how you handle all of these feelings that will determine if you are ultimately happy in your marriage.

  • Trust.  Trust in marriages is one of the most essential ingredients for being happy in your relationship.  No matter if you and your spouse occasionally seek out the physical attention of others, as long as you’re not betraying a trust when you do it.  Trust depends on the individual couple, because what might not matter to some is a big deal to others.  That’s why it’s important to make sure that your spouse knows what is expected.  You can’t just say “don’t hurt me”.  You have to be specific in your expectations.  You should say something more like, “This is what I believe.  I expect you to always respect that belief and not try to change it.”  Your spouse then knows that you trust them to respect your beliefs and not try to go against them or change them in any way.  Keep in mind that trust is also a two way street, so in order for your spouse to trust you, you have to trust them.
  • Respect.  You might not always love your spouse.  You might not even always like your spouse, but you should always respect them.  When you live with someone for years and years, it can seem as if you go from being very close and loving to slightly apart sometimes.  This is okay and it’s normal, but even when you’re feeling at your furthest from one another, you should still respect them and their feelings.  Then get back to being close and in love.
  • Know the dynamic of your relationship.  Every relationship has its own special ebb and flow.  They are constantly changing – shifting.  Sometimes the two of you will be red-hot and unable to keep your hands off each other.  You might feel like kids with the way you giggle and touch all the time.  Then other times life’s demands get in the way of this carefree attitude.  Work and family demands, being tired, not feeling well and getting stressed out can really take its toll on your relationship.  The key is to allow these feelings and emotions from your partner and try to get things back to good and reconnect as soon as possible.  Don’t take offense if your spouse is angry and just needs to vent, be a calming voice and help them to sort through the problems.  And don’t worry, you’ll get back to that care free loving way you were before.
  • Intimacy.  It cannot be said enough how intimacy has to be one of the biggest secrets to a happy marriage.  You want to have physical intimacy of course, but when you know that your spouse knows your deepest secrets – even the things that you won’t put into words and doesn’t use them against you, you have true intimacy.  Intimacy is that special closeness that comes from allowing your partner to know all of you and knowing that he or she respects and loves all of you despite even your biggest flaws.

You might have some key secrets to keeping your marriage happy, and surely there are many more than just these listed, but when you know the secrets to keeping your marriage happy and you make sure to work at it, you will find that your life and love is richer and longer lasting than you ever could imagine.